Greetings naked apes,
I am Kevin,the epitome of brilliance,poise and handsomeness.
Today instead of a 'my day diary' post I am going to post top coolie songs. I am very music forward,my style of music SO deserves to be played at 'Sash'.
1. Billie Holiday-I'll be seeing you. My Rating: *****
2. Mariah Carey-Obsessed. My Rating: ****
3. Hannah Montana-Ordinary Gurl (oh yeah I said 'gurl'!) My Rating: ****
4. Boyzone-Love Me For A Reason. My Rating: *****
5. Sean Kingston-Beautiful Girl. (I'm so hip and coolio) My Rating: ****
6. Michael Bolton-Can I touch you there. (I'm so naughty!) My Rating: *****
Now that is all Earthlings.
Listen to those songs (especially the last one) and think of me...
Kevin.
This is a blog about a dashing boy,me and my wonderous tales and stories. I might upload a few of my greatest drawings. This is a blog guaranteed to make you fall for me! FOLLOW!
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Saturday, February 26, 2011
My Day 25/2/2011
Good Morning, Early Birds.
I woke at about Eight this morning,My My! I was up being SICK with my bruise that my SICK cousin gave to me.So Darling Mummy gave me a speical breckfast consisting of,Pink Juice,Mummas' boys biscuits and a Hippo pancake.
Mummy dressed me in my new Mother-Care Monkey top and denim dungarees.She said I looked darling.I thought I did too,but then we saw Daragh and Ultan 'Mooching' about outside Tesco when mummy and I went up to buy me my Speical milk (as I have a speical condition of lactose intolerant-cy) When they saw us,Daragh shouted over to me ''Oh,HI Kevin, We're seeing an AWFUL lot of you this mid-term,yeah? you must be having SOME FUN with mummy,right,Ulty?'' and 'Ulty' ,in a new striped Hugo Boss Winter collection jumper, Exclaimed ''Yeah,Daragh'' and they ran off laughing.Mummy diden't unterstand,she said ''Why were those boys laughing at you,Kevin? Are they in your class?'' ''Yeah'' I mumbled.
''Don't use such a VILE term,Kevin! Did I raise you in a cave?!'' then her voice softened a little. ''Do I have to go to the school about it?''
''No..Maybe..I don't know,Mummy!'' I said,and started to bawl.Mummy looked around anxiously,as-if I was embarassing her deliberately.She took a sudden grab of my milk,and stormed out of the shop.It could have been a good dramatic escape,but then disaster! the alarm started to wail,and security gaurds were coming towards us.They took one look at me and said ''I'm sure this was a mistake..''.We were let off easy but everyone was still looking at us as if we just landed from planet Coo-Coo.
Mummy shouted ''IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT, KEVIN.'' And she dragged me away still shouting.
She shoved me into my booster seat and strapped me in tightly.
Then when she got into the car,her lips pressed together,she said in her sweetest tone,taking a deep,deep breath, ''Would you like a jumper like that little ginger head boy,Kevin?''
I thought about saying no,but it WAS a nice jumper so.. ''Yes please,Mummy!''
Then,as we were driving off into the afternoon sunlight, I gazed out my window to see the carton of milk was dripping onto the pavement.
I sighed and smiled and wondered how everything turns out ok. (Wow I'm handsome AND deep! Ladies you are LUCKY!)
More later humans,
Kevin.
I woke at about Eight this morning,My My! I was up being SICK with my bruise that my SICK cousin gave to me.So Darling Mummy gave me a speical breckfast consisting of,Pink Juice,Mummas' boys biscuits and a Hippo pancake.
Mummy dressed me in my new Mother-Care Monkey top and denim dungarees.She said I looked darling.I thought I did too,but then we saw Daragh and Ultan 'Mooching' about outside Tesco when mummy and I went up to buy me my Speical milk (as I have a speical condition of lactose intolerant-cy) When they saw us,Daragh shouted over to me ''Oh,HI Kevin, We're seeing an AWFUL lot of you this mid-term,yeah? you must be having SOME FUN with mummy,right,Ulty?'' and 'Ulty' ,in a new striped Hugo Boss Winter collection jumper, Exclaimed ''Yeah,Daragh'' and they ran off laughing.Mummy diden't unterstand,she said ''Why were those boys laughing at you,Kevin? Are they in your class?'' ''Yeah'' I mumbled.
''Don't use such a VILE term,Kevin! Did I raise you in a cave?!'' then her voice softened a little. ''Do I have to go to the school about it?''
''No..Maybe..I don't know,Mummy!'' I said,and started to bawl.Mummy looked around anxiously,as-if I was embarassing her deliberately.She took a sudden grab of my milk,and stormed out of the shop.It could have been a good dramatic escape,but then disaster! the alarm started to wail,and security gaurds were coming towards us.They took one look at me and said ''I'm sure this was a mistake..''.We were let off easy but everyone was still looking at us as if we just landed from planet Coo-Coo.
Mummy shouted ''IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT, KEVIN.'' And she dragged me away still shouting.
She shoved me into my booster seat and strapped me in tightly.
Then when she got into the car,her lips pressed together,she said in her sweetest tone,taking a deep,deep breath, ''Would you like a jumper like that little ginger head boy,Kevin?''
I thought about saying no,but it WAS a nice jumper so.. ''Yes please,Mummy!''
Then,as we were driving off into the afternoon sunlight, I gazed out my window to see the carton of milk was dripping onto the pavement.
I sighed and smiled and wondered how everything turns out ok. (Wow I'm handsome AND deep! Ladies you are LUCKY!)
More later humans,
Kevin.
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
My Day 22/2/11
I woke up quite early: 5a.m but decided to get up. I drew some more pictures of my hunny and this time used watercolour-oh my!
Mummy was better today as she let me have billy roll on my toast. We then went to a near by shop (twas a newsagents/grocers) and I caught sight of the 'shag bands'. In 2010,everyone in school was obsessed with them. And I,Kevin,was master. I had 100s,everyone wanted some off me! I WAS KING! Mummy thought they were just colourful bracelets but nay nay!
She soon found out what they meant. I got banned from Stardoll,Billy Roll and sketching for 2 weeks.
But my king-ness was spectacular while it lasted.
Yesterday I asked for some 'colour-dee bands' and Mummy said a firm no.
THE REST OF THE DAY WAS BORING.
MY COUSIN WENT HOME BLAH BLAAAAAH.
And he punched me. And my bruise is black and yellow with specks of blue.
Kevin.
Mummy was better today as she let me have billy roll on my toast. We then went to a near by shop (twas a newsagents/grocers) and I caught sight of the 'shag bands'. In 2010,everyone in school was obsessed with them. And I,Kevin,was master. I had 100s,everyone wanted some off me! I WAS KING! Mummy thought they were just colourful bracelets but nay nay!
She soon found out what they meant. I got banned from Stardoll,Billy Roll and sketching for 2 weeks.
But my king-ness was spectacular while it lasted.
Yesterday I asked for some 'colour-dee bands' and Mummy said a firm no.
THE REST OF THE DAY WAS BORING.
MY COUSIN WENT HOME BLAH BLAAAAAH.
And he punched me. And my bruise is black and yellow with specks of blue.
Kevin.
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
MY DAY: 21/2/11
Hello Mortals,
So today was quite an accustomed day. I slept in until 6:30 am and then I got up,dusted and polished my collectibles and my stamp collections. Then mummy made me oatmeal with milk and homemade apple puree. My stupid sister told me it was a baby breakfast,she couldn't talk,she had Cow & Gate and she's 9! HONESTLY!
So then I went on my Stardoll and had some online interactive fun there and I looked cool in my yellow shirt and matching mug.
At around 10,mummy called me for bath time. I argued and said I could do it myself (but that was just because my cousin was present [as their mummy and father have been gone to Las Vegas for a week of gambling,smoking and of course,drinking.] and incase he'd think it strange that mummy still bathes me though I cannot decipher how that is strange...) but mummy hauled me into the bath and said I was being a baby with my 'little action figures' so why couldn't I be bathed by my mummy!
SIGH!
I was then dragged into endless hours of shopping. My 9 year old sister wanted makeup and asked in SUCH a sickening tone that she got some! My dearest Ashling can only pull off makeup! Even then it's quite subtle but smoken hot! Quite like me,actually.
Mummy asked why I was in such a sulk and I mumbled something significant about missing Russia. That usually pulls mummy's heart strings but today her heart was no puppet. Oooh my my! What a quote I made there!
We went to Mothercare and mummy bought me a new (quite tight-fitting) top with a little monkey on it with a speech bubble saying ''Mummy's Little Monkey''. I think it's quite coolie.
So we had lunch in the shopping centre. My,wasn't I the cooliest with my mummy at Burger King? I even got a cardboard crown!
Then disaster struck.
I saw Daragh,Brian,Ultan (in a new Hugo Boss Jumper) and Lorcan sauntering around. They're my fellos but they make fun of people who go uptown with their mummys,I don't know why.
Their ''hardy.''
I hid behind mummy but they all call ''Kevin! ARE YOU WITH YOUR MA?!'' Then they run off,laughing.
I started to cry so mummy carted me off to the ladies bathrooms and mopped me up and said she'd take me to Art & Hobby to treat me to new Lego. But I told her that Lego was what people like Jason (used to be in my class,he's a dork HAW HAW) played with. I wanted a new sketch pad with pencils,a new scrapbook and in Easons: Warhammar and White Dwarf!
Mummy sighed. I'm beginning to think my mother is having some sort of female breakdown.
We had to go home,just as I was having so much fun!
My sister's stupid friends came round. It's so stupid,we're off school for a week and they ''totally have to see each other or we'll like,die!''
So I read my magazines,sketched a few pictures of Ashling and what she may look like in 5 years,I've since decided : splendiferous and foxy!
I drew her in a lacy,decollete,black frock and patent shoes and -OH MY- fishnet tights!
Well for dinner we had smiley faces,beans and special shaped chicken nuggets.
Father came home and mummy expressed her feelings and he pretended to care.
I went up to the guest room to see my cousin and he was in his underpants on the phone!
Lig me scread as dom. (Irish for 'I let a scream out of me' Obviously.) He pushed me against the wall,covered my mouth,muttered into the phone and hung up.
'SHUT UP KEVIN!' he boxed me on the shoulder. I winced with the pain and let a squeak out. (There's a bruise there now by the way)
'What was that for?' I tried to sound tough. Well I am the toughest,hardiest,coolest guy around so...I didn't have to try.
'I was on the phone to my girlfriend!' He hissed.
'In your underwear?' I was intrigued,is this what boys do when they're on the phone to their girlfriends?
He turned puce. 'Don't tell your mammy,' He begged.
I nodded. 'Yes. I mean, yeah cool...bro.'
'Dont' do that,Kevin.' He sighed.
'Yes.I mean yea-'
'OKAY I GET IT! NOW GO!'
I was pushed out of the room.
I had something against him.
And that was my day.
Kevin.
So today was quite an accustomed day. I slept in until 6:30 am and then I got up,dusted and polished my collectibles and my stamp collections. Then mummy made me oatmeal with milk and homemade apple puree. My stupid sister told me it was a baby breakfast,she couldn't talk,she had Cow & Gate and she's 9! HONESTLY!
So then I went on my Stardoll and had some online interactive fun there and I looked cool in my yellow shirt and matching mug.
At around 10,mummy called me for bath time. I argued and said I could do it myself (but that was just because my cousin was present [as their mummy and father have been gone to Las Vegas for a week of gambling,smoking and of course,drinking.] and incase he'd think it strange that mummy still bathes me though I cannot decipher how that is strange...) but mummy hauled me into the bath and said I was being a baby with my 'little action figures' so why couldn't I be bathed by my mummy!
SIGH!
I was then dragged into endless hours of shopping. My 9 year old sister wanted makeup and asked in SUCH a sickening tone that she got some! My dearest Ashling can only pull off makeup! Even then it's quite subtle but smoken hot! Quite like me,actually.
Mummy asked why I was in such a sulk and I mumbled something significant about missing Russia. That usually pulls mummy's heart strings but today her heart was no puppet. Oooh my my! What a quote I made there!
We went to Mothercare and mummy bought me a new (quite tight-fitting) top with a little monkey on it with a speech bubble saying ''Mummy's Little Monkey''. I think it's quite coolie.
So we had lunch in the shopping centre. My,wasn't I the cooliest with my mummy at Burger King? I even got a cardboard crown!
Then disaster struck.
I saw Daragh,Brian,Ultan (in a new Hugo Boss Jumper) and Lorcan sauntering around. They're my fellos but they make fun of people who go uptown with their mummys,I don't know why.
Their ''hardy.''
I hid behind mummy but they all call ''Kevin! ARE YOU WITH YOUR MA?!'' Then they run off,laughing.
I started to cry so mummy carted me off to the ladies bathrooms and mopped me up and said she'd take me to Art & Hobby to treat me to new Lego. But I told her that Lego was what people like Jason (used to be in my class,he's a dork HAW HAW) played with. I wanted a new sketch pad with pencils,a new scrapbook and in Easons: Warhammar and White Dwarf!
Mummy sighed. I'm beginning to think my mother is having some sort of female breakdown.
We had to go home,just as I was having so much fun!
My sister's stupid friends came round. It's so stupid,we're off school for a week and they ''totally have to see each other or we'll like,die!''
So I read my magazines,sketched a few pictures of Ashling and what she may look like in 5 years,I've since decided : splendiferous and foxy!
I drew her in a lacy,decollete,black frock and patent shoes and -OH MY- fishnet tights!
Well for dinner we had smiley faces,beans and special shaped chicken nuggets.
Father came home and mummy expressed her feelings and he pretended to care.
I went up to the guest room to see my cousin and he was in his underpants on the phone!
Lig me scread as dom. (Irish for 'I let a scream out of me' Obviously.) He pushed me against the wall,covered my mouth,muttered into the phone and hung up.
'SHUT UP KEVIN!' he boxed me on the shoulder. I winced with the pain and let a squeak out. (There's a bruise there now by the way)
'What was that for?' I tried to sound tough. Well I am the toughest,hardiest,coolest guy around so...I didn't have to try.
'I was on the phone to my girlfriend!' He hissed.
'In your underwear?' I was intrigued,is this what boys do when they're on the phone to their girlfriends?
He turned puce. 'Don't tell your mammy,' He begged.
I nodded. 'Yes. I mean, yeah cool...bro.'
'Dont' do that,Kevin.' He sighed.
'Yes.I mean yea-'
'OKAY I GET IT! NOW GO!'
I was pushed out of the room.
I had something against him.
And that was my day.
Kevin.
Monday, February 21, 2011
Introduction!!!!
Greetings,now before we get started I must tell you basic facts:
-I am Kevin,a total hunk.
-I love Warhammer and White Dwarf.
-I collect action figures.
-I draw.
-I have lots of friends.
-I am Russian.
-I am currently single but considering how smoking hot I am that will change soon.
-I always wear this groovy and hip 'hoodie' to school (thats's what the cool fellos like me call a jumper-hoodie) that is navy and blue striped.
-I have an excellent mole that is a ladies magnet.
Now,I have some brain teasers for you all to drool upon:
1. 56X34-12X2= ?
2. E=mc_?
3. 20% of 5,000,820= ?
4. 432+4583X782= ?
5. WHY AM I STILL SINGLE?
Goodbye Mortals.
Kevin.
-I am Kevin,a total hunk.
-I love Warhammer and White Dwarf.
-I collect action figures.
-I draw.
-I have lots of friends.
-I am Russian.
-I am currently single but considering how smoking hot I am that will change soon.
-I always wear this groovy and hip 'hoodie' to school (thats's what the cool fellos like me call a jumper-hoodie) that is navy and blue striped.
-I have an excellent mole that is a ladies magnet.
Now,I have some brain teasers for you all to drool upon:
1. 56X34-12X2= ?
2. E=mc_?
3. 20% of 5,000,820= ?
4. 432+4583X782= ?
5. WHY AM I STILL SINGLE?
Goodbye Mortals.
Kevin.
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